So I had this idea for the final 7 faces of my nearly-completed challenge.
Given that I had only 3 days to draw those 7 pictures (because my self-discipline is poor and I did not draw every single day, like I was supposed to)…
… and because I wanted to test my consistency by redrawing the same face multiple times…
…. and because I wanted to try out drawing a bigger variety of expressions…
… and because I still had it in mind that I wanted to bookend my project with self-portraits…
I decided that I would draw 7 pictures of myself as a sort of grand finale to this whole thing.
It started off well. I went home Friday night and took a bunch of cheesy snapshots of myself with cheesy expressions on my face: anger, surprise, etc. They weren’t great photos, but I got them printed at the drugstore, so you know my intention must have been sincere, if I was going to let some teen-aged photo clerk see photos of me making a fool of myself. But the photos were meant for a reference only, so I didn’t really care what they looked like.
So, come Sunday afternoon (yeah, yeah … I waited till Sunday afternoon; ref. above mention of self-discipline deficiency), I sat down and pulled out my sketch pad, pencil and photos. I told myself that I wasn’t going to spend too much time on any one picture — I had 7 to do, after all, and even if I only spent 30 minutes on each one (a reasonable estimate for the others I’ve done this month) that would mean 3 and half hours. These were going to be rough and dirty sketchwork, only.
I was on number 3 (surprised!) when I realized I wasn’t having fun. Remember way back at #9 I said I wasn’t enjoying trying to draw real people. So what made me think I’d want to do it 7 times in a row? And, compounding the issue, do it 7 times using less-than-flattering pictures of myself? Disregarding the quality of the pictures, which wasn’t encouraging, I couldn’t get past the boredom of what I was doing. Not even giving myself permission to be perfectly bad by saying I wouldn’t have to post them made me want to keep going.
Was it the repetition of doing the same face over and over (so much for my career as a graphic novelist!)? Or was it that my face is just so darn boring? I dunno. I just knew I didn’t want to draw that face anymore, no matter how many funny expressions it was twisted into. I even tried a few hours later, but couldn’t urge myself beyond a basic oval for the head and circles for eyeballs.
I told myself that enough was enough and there was no sense forcing myself to do something I wasn’t enjoying, and that I wasn’t going to be proud to show off in the end. So I stopped, and since I felt relief instead of guilt, I know it was the right choice.
The only thing left to decide was whether or not I was going to try and make up those seven faces once my 30 days was up. Which, ultimately, was more important? The time spent or the quantitative output. Truth is, the answer would have been a toss-up, except for one thing — there are all these words battering at my brain, trying to get out.
See, what with trying to produce a decent looking drawing a day, all my personal time has been pretty filled up, and my writing output in the last month has been practically nil. Now, it could be that I needed that verbal down time, but my writer-mind is starting to reassert itself. Drawing is fun, but those words are always going to demand more attention from me.
So, I am calling and end to my self-imposed 30 Days, 30 Faces challenge, with only 23 “finished” drawings. I have learned a lot — especially how much more there is to learn! Don’t think that this means you won’t see more drawings from me in the future; revisions of some I’ve done this past month, and new faces that suggest themselves to me. I also want to try and paint some of them — for some reason, I have a particular reason to paint Emryn. And sense I am a shameless exhibitionist, you are sure to see some of it pop up here.
I want to offer my sincere thanks to everyone who commented — your encouragement meant (and continues to mean) a lot. There’s just something about having an appreciative audience that compels me to keep going. It must be the latent actress in me, always seeking applause. Seriously, you’re the best.
Oh: today’s the last day to make an entry into the contest to Name This Guy. I’ll make a decision tomorrow and post the winner.
That is all! We now return you to your regularly scheduled blogging.